these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I am one with the molecules
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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