my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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