Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize
