you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize