can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I am naked and annoyed.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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