his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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