i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I believe in your delicious
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
