Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She's the barista slut.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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