That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
