I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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