We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Panties = found
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
