I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
