Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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