i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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