I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize