Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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