Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize