Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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