U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
