Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
the day after is always just damage control
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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