Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
