Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
