sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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