Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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