can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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