I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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