some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
