i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
