Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
