The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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