Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
