I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
