seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
