grandma shit on top of the toilet
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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