Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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