She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Randomize
