anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
