Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
