You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
