Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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