they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I need moral support for this bender
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
