If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
