Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
