i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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