You're a womanizer and a bitch.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
farters have to be the big spoon...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
