That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
