my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
