Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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