got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize