holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
She told me I should be a condom model.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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