don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
