Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
